Wednesday, February 22, 2012

A lil bit of Mississippi


                So I’ve been in Mississippi now since the beginning of February and I have to say coming back home and being with my parents and seeing all my of my best friends has been wonderful. I spent about 4 and a half days in Winter Springs, Fl which is right outside of Orlando with a fantastic couple, Dugan and Robin!  Dugan served with Jeremy while he was with 1st LAR.  As I’m sure many of you know Jeremy and I were avid Harley riders, he had a HD 1995 Softail Custom.  Well while I’ve been home my Dad found an amazing deal on a HD Nightster 1200 and bought it for me!  As of yesterday I have started to learn how to ride!  It’s so much fun and I know Jeremy is watching me thinking, “Dude that’s badass!”  I have a long way to go but I know I’ll get it and one day I will ride down Route 66 like Jeremy and I had always dreamed of doing and I’m going to do it with a huge smile on my face and tears running down my cheeks!
             Last Saturday my Dad and I were able to go on my first Patriot Guard Ride supporting a family and showing respect to a fallen military service member.  I debated on whether to go or not but decided that if I didn’t I was being selfish.  There are so many others that have lost a close loved one and they still have the strength to go and show support which I know that I want to too.  There were so many people that came and supported Jeremy at his flight in from Dover, the visitation and the funeral.  It was time to do the right thing and give back.  It was hard to watch at times because I know the pain that the family is going through and how hard it is to bury the love of your life, not to mention how it brought back memories but in the same breath I’m so glad that I went and ended up meeting a bunch of great people in the process.  It was super cold and raining and the ride was about 45 minutes from the house but we didn’t care we suited up as warm as possible and we did the damn thing and mission accomplished!
            
              As awesome as it has been here in Mississippi I am definitely getting Texas home sick and it just confirms that no matter how much I love my family and friends here in Mississippi I don’t think I will ever be able to move back.  I feel as though as I am reaching my tolerance of being so far away from Jeremy and where he lies.  I understand he’s really not really there but it’s where I go to be able to feel close to him.  I’m for sure tired of the rollercoaster of emotions, just when I think I’m progressing and feeling better the next day I feel like I’m back where I was a few months ago.  I miss him so much that I sometimes I don’t even know what to do besides get out of bed and try to conquer the world with my Hawkers.  This little brat is crazy and I am so glad I have him to keep me company!  I just try and do my day to day in hopes that I make Jeremy proud.  Anyways, I’m headed back to Texas on MONDAY!  GET READY!

Much Love…
Rachel